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Fear Transfer

Have you ever had a moment in time where everything is out of focus and suddenly becomes crystal clear? It’s like I was walking around the world needing a pair of glasses and one day someone said ONE THING and my vision was corrected almost instantly. Does that mean that my vision won’t change or need improvement in the future? I’m going to assume (and hope) that how I see and interpret the world will ALWAYS change, but for now it is all so crystal clear.

I went to RISE and something that Rachel Hollis continued to say was, “you can live in love or you can live in fear”. She’s not the first person to say this and she surely won’t be last, but where’s the lie? You can truly measure every choice, word, thought, and direction that you have taken in life and it is either out of love or fear! This concept made me start to pick my life apart and wonder whether fear or love was winning current situations and here’s what I learned yall- fear was winning WAY more than I wanted to admit. Where did that come from? How many opportunities have I missed or lost out on because I was fearful? Where would I be in life if I had been operating from a place of love when I made choices or turned down opportunities?

I was taking OTHER people’s fears of failing and making them my fears to succeed. Read that again if you need to. I was far too worried about what others thought, what others would say, and I was just simply living in fear.

I was able to go backwards and realize that everytime something good happened in my Mom’s life she would vocally worry and say things like, “we will see when the other shoe drops”. Now that I am older I see that I took this on as a child, which is wild but makes a lot of sense. My Mom constantly waited for things to “be bad again” out of fear and ultimately missed the moment to bask in the ambiance of the moment. Our neurotransmitters can be a biological reason for our fear, but most of the time it all boils back down to our environmental factors.

My friend shared THE MOST incredible story with me and she said that when she’s around her kids, she may be AFRAID of snakes, but her kids will never know that. She said to me, “sometimes you just have to pet the snake to ensure that your kids will not be afraid of the same things you are when they grow up”. This statement hit me right in the feels. What an incredible realization for a parent to have! You DO share your fears with your kids and some of them aren’t healthy! People who love us can have the best intentions that are fear based (your bestie not wanting you to walk down an ally by yourself), but if we are honest most of our fears just hold us back from our potential.

There are plenty of reasons why keeping fear in my back pocket worked for me and seemingly played out in my favor (like refusing to sky dive, literally zero regrets there), but I also know that FEAR has HELD ME BACK from so much...and it’s held you back too! Fear is a liar!

I encourage you to sit down and make a list of the things you can think of that FEAR has held you back from. If you had ZERO fear…. What would you do? If you feel led, share them in the comments of this blog, on Fire To Inspire on Facebook, or you can privately share them by emailing me at

Join me in my “Fire To Inspire” Facebook group to hear more about this topic (and more) at 7:11pm (CST) on Thursdays.

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