Updated: Sep 21, 2021
What is one of the nicest things someone has ever said to you?
It may be hard for you to recall this information but eventually you can reach a place where you know and remember the nice things that someone has said about you.
I’m going to throw you for a loop and ask you, “why don’t you say those things to yourself?”.
Why is it that we can go out of our way and be selfless for others and not ourselves? Let’s be real most of us take really great care of the people around us! When I started to evaluate this behavior in myself it blew my mind how wonderful I can often be towards others but how nasty I can tend to be towards myself, so I changed it.
My life turned around entirely, I’m not joking! I started to treat myself like my own best friend! It sounds like a simple concept until you really crawl into your brain and assess how you speak to YOU! It was insane how defensive I would get when I decided to be ugly to myself. If I’m honest, this blog wouldn’t have been posted a year ago, I would have beat myself up and been discouraged.
I am what most would call a “right fighter“. I will defend anyone’s honor to the death, which can sometimes be one of my least attractive qualities (Just know that when ya girl goes all in, she goes ALL in)! I couldn‘t believe some of the things I heard ME say TO MYSELF! I’d say things like, “why even try, you’ll fail”, “you look like a sumo wrestler in this dress”, “no one wants to read what you write”, or “if you’d shut up maybe people wouldn’t have things to say about you Amanda”. Like who in the actual….. let’s be REALLY clear here- I WISH someone would speak to someone else like that in MY presence, but y’all it WAS ME TALKING TO ME!!! HOW is that acceptable? The simple answer is- it’s NOT!
So let me just leave you with this nugget. What if you started to console yourself the way you would your best friend if she calls when she’s upset? What if every time you got dressed you hollered “YAS QUEEN”, like you would if your bestie was getting all dolled up to slay the town? I want you to sit with that for a second and be honest about how much you DON’T do that with yourself…. It’s ok, it was a rude awakening for me too sis!
When you hear yourself start to be hateful and say horrific things aimed towards yourself (or even others), you must stop and defend them OR YOU right away! Treat your comments like you would a child and nurture yourself to freedom.
I hope you read this and it inspires you to speak more lovingly towards yourself. Sometimes we are our own worst enemy without even realizing it. You are worthy of your own love, your own respect, and only you are responsible for how you talk to yourself.
YOU are your own bestie and giiiirrrrl let me tell you this- YOU will always be stuck with YOU so it’s best that you have a great relationship with her right?
Write down all of your best qualities like your best friend would!